Title IX and the Rapists It Protects
I’m gonna tell ya a lovely fuckin fairy tale about college, friends, and rape.
Long, long ago in a far away land….
Ha, that’s a good one! It’s actually you and me and right this moment.
The evil overlords’ ruling:
What I actually said:
OCR is supposed to enforce Title IX and impose sanctions when schools fuck it up. This is them in action. They didn’t even bother to address the fact that I’m disabled by the PTSD from having lived through this crap–a disability that’s been verified by the government since I receive Medicaid. Having a health condition that causes depression so bad it makes you want to die apparently isn’t a good enough reason to grant a waiver. Inability to file due to not being able to tolerate the process. Medical reasons. They don’t accept that. You get out of jury duty for that, but apparently OCR is holier than thou.
Who is this meant to help? The victim, or the school and the rapist?
Are these idiots even educated in the subject they’ve been put in charge of? Fuck your health, you are expected to suffer that damage or swear off your rights. Choose wisely. You’ll regret it no matter what you do.
Retaliation isn’t reasonable? Fuck your safety, go rattle pots at your enemies’ door and antagonize them further, *after* they’ve already made threats and taken steps against you. It’s not like people have ever followed through with their threats after you’ve tried to report them. It’s not like that’s exactly what happened in my case. No, never, that doesn’t happen, not in the la la land OCR rules from. OCR expects that you keep suffering under the people who threaten you, who have made your life unlivable, because you are not worth safety and accommodation, because it doesn’t matter if you are dealt harm. That’s what they expect when they say you cannot delay until you have reached a safe space. You must endanger yourself if you expect to have your rights protected. Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to, a civil rights office that investigates retaliation?!….Oh, ummm…..(shit.)
Or is it that they only reason they’ll take a case is if it’s already been pushed way past any remedy and you need out of that situation immediately? In that case, how the fuck do think it’s a great idea to finish your degree at a place like that? Do they really expect you to go right back in with those disgusting people? Do they not understand the magnitude of what they’re dealing with? Are they agreeing that you can’t possibly get a degree if things are so bad that you have to file and OCR complaint–in which case, they should sympathize with anyone who doesn’t have the option to risk their future and education on the OCR’s say so?
Or maybe it’s that OCR, the final line of hope against the tide of college rape, finds nothing wrong with colleges threatening students into silence. Fear of retaliation, even when severe retaliation and damage to your person has already been documented, is not enough reason to delay filing against them. Having your health decimated to the point of suicidal ideation isn’t enough damage to qualify for a waiver. Damage to the point that you have disabling PTSD, that you have closer and closer brushes with suicide every time you’re forced to interact with it, isn’t enough reason to grant a waiver of an arbitrary time limit. Those things are so not worth the Department of Education’s time that they’ll not even bother to mention it when they reject you.
Immediately sue your school, give up all of your work references, decimate your CV, if you want to enforce your rights and see your school punished for what they did. Oh, did you need those things to get hired? You mean you need to be in good standing with your school in order to get hired and continue functioning in life? You mean that stuff doesn’t just fall from trees in six months’ time? It’s not like being raped and beaten down will destroy your ability to cope and thus your ability to get yourself hired right out of school. Haha, fuck that, too bad for you. Your rights or your future, choose wisely. Good golly gosh, who are these ridiculous limits really meant to help?
Fuck your safety, fuck your health, fuck your future. Choose your safety or choose your rights: you can’t have both. And god forbid you try to make the best of your situation, that’s clearly evidence that there is no “situation” at all. That’s evidence of you deliberately delaying, and therefore things can’t have possibly been illegal enough to warrant investigation. No one who is truly traumatized, who is truly threatened, could fight back against their college. No college that is truly breaking the law would allow you to graduate.
You graduated, that’s all that matters! Fuck your ongoing medical costs, we don’t give a shit about your disabling PTSD! Fuck the three extra years of tuition and multiple costs incurred because of what they did to you! Fuck the cost of an education you can’t use because they disabled you!
Precious, precious arbitrary time frame for precious, precious arbitrary reasons.
FUCK YOU!!!! HAHAHHAHAH!
Those concrete costs that OCR promises they can recoup for you? NOPE! Go wish upon a star for all the good it’ll do you!
Isn’t retaliation what OCR is supposed to understand and fight against…? Aren’t they supposed to know that causes people to be afraid to say anything…? Isn’t that what has caused this entire problem, what makes OCR necessary as a regulatory branch? Are we seriously supposed to go from that to immediately trusting the people who have fucked us over for decades to suddenly help? Title IX ain’t new, where the fuck has OCR been the last three decades?
Oh, I know where they’ve been. Fucking us twice over, because knowing your rights means shit all when the goddamn government ignores you and the assholes infringing on you are allowed to flagrantly do it over and over in broad daylight.
FUCK YOU! YOU LOSE NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO!
Was your trust in the system abused, maybe because the very people who were supposed to protect you instead raped you and laughed at you, tried to expel you for reporting their own employees as rapists? Too goddamn bad for you! You should have known to try again anyway, maybe we wouldn’t have fucked you over too! They’re just going to ignore the fact that they’re proving exactly what you believed about them, that none of them are trustworthy and none of them actually care. HAVE ANOTHER REJECTION!
Fuck you for thinking you would be protected, you naive infant. Laws are nothing but in name only.
And they wonder why reports are so low. Lol. They function just like the mob does–fucked if you do, fucked if you don’t. But wait–don’t mob snitches get immunity in return for protection, no matter what they’ve done or why they’ve waited to come forward? Where’s the attitude about retaliation and the damage inflicted there? Why do we treat known criminals so much better than rape victims? You know why–criminals have value while rape victims don’t.
Does anyone actually believe that you can graduate from a college while you’re suing it? They fucking tried to expel me for merely pointing out that they fucked me over. Do you really think it’s a smart idea to complete your credits on a campus that clearly hates you? People always ask domestic violence victims “why did she stay”, and yet here I’m expected to have stayed in exactly that relationship. What the fuck are you smoking to think that’s an intelligent thing to do?
That’s the la la land OCR lives in. Hundreds of thousands in tuition riding on getting that degree? Haha, fuck you, risk it all on OCR’s say so or you’re not getting your rights from us. Fuck you if you’re naive enough to trust them not to fuck you over as badly as the colleges they oversee, and fuck you if you’re dumb enough to forgo filing with them only to come back whining to that you’ve been treated badly.
Risk your invested tuition, your graduation, and your entire future on trusting OCR or shut the fuck up. It’s only a quarter million dollars gone to waste. Oh, you think other schools will take you? My god, have you never heard about the “loud mouthed bitches” no respectable school will touch? Surely nobody is so goddamn ignorant to believe that’s actually possible after suing a school. Schools expel their victims for a reason, nobody will take you after that. But trust in OCR, they promise that what happens to everyone else won’t possibly happen to you. Google them and see how many cases they’ve fucked up, see how long it’s taken them to get their asses in gear. Four years is longest case I know of, and look at the paltry decision there. Fuckin peanuts compared to the real damage. They don’t even cover all of the damage caused, just certain physical stuff–so all the reputation and academic damage done to your record, that no grad school will touch you with a ten foot pole? That you lost all your CV references because nobody in admin would corroborate your “wild stories”, that you need ongoing medical care? Too bad, witchy bitch. Shouldn’t have squealed, shouldn’t have been such a smart ass to weigh your options and judge OCR for the fraudulent scam it is.
Can’t pull that kind of money and wasted time out of your ass to fritter away on a useless education? Awww, too bad for you, you should have considered that risk before you went to college. Rape insurance, you know.
Can’t put your life on hold or support yourself while nobody will hire you, while you have an unfinished education, while everyone believes you’re a lying witch, while you can’t work because of the PTSD? Poor poor baby, your parents shouldn’t have had kids if they couldn’t afford you. Fucking mooches.
Parents kick you out because you’re a dirty slut, trying to lie about why you can’t finish school and support yourself? They’re right to do so, you’re worthless. Die, bitch, die, these are the consequences for trying to ruin an innocent man’s life. These are the consequences for shaming the family with your poor judgement and your toddler-tantrum “PTSD”.
It’s so nice to live in la la land.
This is how far they’ll go to ensure you don’t report, and that if you do that you won’t get any further. To ensure that their rapists and their enabling colleges will go free, unpunished–and free to rape again.
Did you think the system that rapes its students would indict itself?
Did you think the system that hires rapists and abusers would find fault with terroristic silencing tactics, would find fault with exploiting those easy loopholes around a law they don’t want to enforce in the first place?
If you’ve got a daughter, you can rest easy–she’ll never come home to say she was raped.
She knows these rules. She knows this cost. She’ll hide it and never speak of it. It’s the safest choice, promising the least damage.
Think about that–not getting help causes the least damage. Not getting justice, knowing that your rapist is out there, knowing that you can’t speak a word against him, that anyone can do this to you again and again, is the *least* amount of damage. How much damage is that? People have murdered over less. People have committed suicide over less.
Every soldier who comes home with PTSD, imagine none of them getting treatment. I’m telling you that being like that is the better choice for women who are victims of sexual violence. That’s a fucking disgraceful indictment of you all reading this, because you’re the people who exonerate these schools, who defend these rapists, who silence these women.
Silence me. Destroy me.
You people are the reason I’ve developed debilitating depression and PTSD. It would have saved me so much pain if I had let those kill me. But I had a goddamn naive hope that the world couldn’t be this intentionally cruel.
I was wrong.
I have been trying to find help since spring 2012. You want a 180 day time line? Start from there, you soulless fucks.
Nobody cared to answer me back then because it “wasn’t severe enough”. I was to “suck it up and stop making excuses for why I couldn’t do the work”. Now, I’m disabled from the shit you forced me through because you wouldn’t help. Now, nobody cares to help because “I should have known to get help sooner”. Real fucking classy, people. Refuse to help then tell me I should have gotten help. Abusive assholes.
Forgo your education or forgo your rights. Don’t come whining to us, we’ll tell you that you should have given up the other one. You can’t win no matter what you do. This is the America you live in, the America your actions built and support.
CMU knew how to drag this out in just the way they needed to so that they’d get off scot free. Despite all the noise being made about how much everyone cares about victims of botched Title IX, nobody actually gives a damn when they have to put their money where their mouths are. They make bullshit laws and bullshit restrictions and exceptions that allow these people to keep doing exactly what they’ve been doing, it’s just that now you get to claim you’re totally on the side of victims while you keep screwing us over.
You know what that does to you, to be ignored and told you deserve this and more? It’s torture. Literal torture. There’s a reason why the CIA uses rape as a torture method. Being forced to come to terms with the fact that you have no control over your own body, that you’re only worth what you can be used for, that they’re being kind by not doing more to you–It’s the best way to break your mind. You have no autonomy, you have no sense of self, you have no refuge in your own body. Not even your own mind is yours. Your body and mind respond to the invasion without you. Those sensations register no matter how much you try to block them. It’s not “just” a physical attack, it’s mental and emotional too, contaminating what is supposed to be loving and intimate with hate and fear.
That’s what I had to deal with, still deal with, during this whole godforsaken charade. What’s the point of trying when you’re beaten down no matter what you do? What’s the point of trying when this kind of shit can happen and not only does nobody care, but the people who did it are lauded and praised, allowed to continue unhindered, while you’re dismissed to die from the pain of what they did?
Relative to the criminal justice system, colleges give you the most ways to obtain justice and help after a rape. After you graduate, you’re left with the asshole citizenry, the dismissive justice system. That’s even worse than the flimsy Title IX. When colleges can get away with this even though they are most likely to face punishment for it, why would I bother trying to live in “the real world”? It offers less protection than college, and look how great that “protection” was. I know a bunch of women who were raped outside of college, are trying to press charges, and are facing the same callous treatment from “advocates” and “prosecutors”. The people who rape in college go on to become your neighbors and coworkers and lawyers and cops. They don’t disappear like everyone seems to believe.
Are you really going to let this stand as acceptable, legal behavior? That colleges can do this as long as they sufficiently render their victim unable to protest? As long as there’s some sham process to slap down any victim who dares to seek help, so that you all can pretend justice really does happen?
That’s what you’re all telling me by refusing my case and refusing to help. All this blathering about “end campus rape” and “enforce title ix” is hot air as long as you allow shit like this. Fucking hypocrites. You want to talk about holding colleges accountable, yet every one of you people brush me off with shallow condolences.
Fix this or stop claiming you’re supporting victims and against rape. You only care when it’s an easy fairy tale narrative, not the mess that life actually makes us live with.
Cut the victim policing and admit you don’t care about the people who need more than 140 characters to tell their stories.
I’m forced to live with what these people chose to do to me. Make them live with it too.
If you’re a lawyer, you know where to find my contact info. My parents are not supportive of me and so I have no money to pay a retainer. I need help.
If you’d like to complain to the people who enabled this, here’s some appropriate people to yell at:
Joseph P. Mahoney
U.S. Department of Education
Office for Civil Rights
100 Penn Square East
The Wanamaker Building,
Suite 515 Philadelphia, PA 19107
CMU President Subra Suresh
CMU VP of Education Amy Burkert
CMU Assoc. Vp & Dean of Student Affairs Gina Casalegno
The OCR, which supposed to enforce our Title IX rights in educational institutions that violate them, has itself been deliberately mishandling our cases in the same way the colleges it oversees have been. I am not the only person who has had to deal with them violating their own rules.
I believe there is enough of us to bring a class action lawsuit against OCR for the damage they have done by refusing to set things right. I have already contacted Know Your IX, End #### On Campus, and SurvJustice.
I may be using incorrect legal terminology for bringing a suit against a government agency by many injured parties. However, you get the idea and I know this type of thing is possible because it’s been done before.
If you have information about this, how to go about it, or would like to be included, please contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
20150414: I filed again, using the exact rules and directions they had complained about the previous time. They rejected it again:
Here is how Title IX treats people who have been victimized. Fuck your health, how dare you try to protect yourself. How dare you think you can ever get help from us. Nothing you do will ever be enough to warrant help. We will always find something wrong with you. We will always protect our rapists. Fuck you.
As long as schools string you along for long enough, they will get away with it. Choose your rights or risk your health and your education.
The lesson here is that you deserve what happened to you. You’re the one who fucked up. Look at all your mistakes. Look at everything that is wrong with you. If only you had listened the first time you were told that you don’t matter.
2015-06-10: About OCR claiming I should have risked reporting earlier, that they would have protected me, that I had nothing to lose in retaliation by CMU? Colleges can prevent you from transferring to another college. They can sabotage your transcripts. OCR can’t do anything about that. And it takes them AN AVERAGE of four years to “help”, in the small number of cases they decide you’re worth it.